Stephen HaynesPoughkeepsie Journal
It was bound to happen, of course, a momentary slip in which familiarity and force of habit would take over.
During a preseason practice, when Evan Cancro sought the attention of his head coach, the Our Lady of Lourdes senior called out, “Mom!”
As the word exited his lips, he realized what he had just uttered, and the immediate chorus of laughs from his teammates indicated how loudly it was said.
“When I was little and she coached my travel team, I would call her that,” the soccer standout said, “and that’s what I’m used to calling her at home.”
Eileen Cancro didn’t make anything of it then, but she did pull her son aside after the practice for a reminder.
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“I’ve known most of these guys since they were little kids,” she said of the boys soccer team, “but out here, no one calls me ‘Mrs. Cancro.’ It’s ‘Coach Eileen.’”
It’s been that way since the spring when the former assistant and longtime club soccer instructor took over as head of the Lourdes program. She joins a short list of women in the local area who’ve led a boys varsity team in recent years.
But, with her experience and soccer acumen, and longstanding relationships with most of the group, players insist the transition has been seamless. And the Warriors’ success this season would attest.
“I don’t even think of the female aspect; I just see her as ‘Coach,’” senior Jack Yough said. “She’s got a long history in coaching and knows what she’s doing, so there’s no question about how qualified she is.”
The proof is in the footing. Despite having graduated several key players, the Warriors haven’t regressed much, if at all. In fact, their 8-1-2 record has them off to a better start than last season — and on a better pace than in their regional championship campaign two years ago.
“We’ve got some of the core still here, but it’s a young team with a lot of sophomores who don’t have much experience,” said Evan Cancro, a midfielder. “So, we’ve had to do some teaching and help the younger guys get going. But we’re jelling and doing really well so far.”
Lourdes repeated as Mid Hudson Athletic League champion last year and went on to reach the Section 9 Class A final, eventually falling to rival Beacon in penalty kicks. Both teams dominated in September and appear poised to again contend.
That the Warriors still are among the title favorites is a testament to the program, its depth and development of upcoming talent, and a tribute to its coaches for navigating what could’ve been a complicated turnover.
“Ed Kosilla deserves a lot of credit,” Eileen Cancro said of her assistant coach, whom the players also lauded. “He’s been in the background for years and has been tremendous. He’s a phenomenal tactician and a joy to work with. There has been a lot of support within the team and even from other coaches in the school.”
Eileen Cancro once starred as a midfielder at Monroe-Woodbury High School, went on to play in the United Soccer League women’s division, and led the Mount St. Mary College women’s team in the 1990s. She’s also coached the Kingston Capitals in the Women’s Premier Soccer League and worked with local travel teams, where she met some of her current pupils.
She joined the Lourdes coaching staff three years ago as a volunteer assistant and contributed to a turnaround and breakthrough that culminated in the Warriors’ 2022 run to the state final. Players last fall praised Cancro for her knowledge and diligence in preparation.
“I don’t know if being a woman makes a difference in this, but I’ve found that in coaching boys, you usually have to earn their trust first,” she said of her experience coaching boys and girls. “You come up with good plans and make good decisions and it becomes, ‘Ok, now I believe in this coach.’”
When it was announced that she would succeed Roy Kievit, there already was confidence in her ability and some comfort in familiarity. Terri Cilento was hired as coach of the Highland High School boys soccer team in 2014 and Lauren Moran last fall led the upstart Arlington boys volleyball team to a Section 1 semifinal.
In some ways, Eileen Cancro is like a football coach. Evan said his mother is “more intense” than most of the soccer coaches he’s played for and described her spending hours at home studying film and formulating strategies. The game plans are then typed and printed for the players.
“I’m not a yeller, but I’m demanding,” said Eileen Cancro, adding that she intends to remain with the team after her son graduates. “I think I’m a good in-game coach in terms of schematics and making adjustments. I try to involve the players in decisions like, ‘Do you want to stay in this or should we change it for the second half?’ I think when they’re involved in the planning, there’s a greater investment in the decision.”
So far so good, of course.
Evan Cancro, Yough and DJ DeVito are established all-section stars who headline the roster and have taken on significant leadership roles. Zach Cervone has elevated his game and flourished, and the emergence of players like Rowan King, Tomas Sargios, Matty DeVito, Grady Collins and Emmanuel Macenat has helped buoy this roster.
“It’s taken a lot of effort, but we’re hard workers and we’ve found ways to get it done,” said Yough, a standout defender. “Coach Eileen is stern, and she demands the most of you. It’s not always easy, but it makes you better. And we’re definitely better.”
Within that impressive record are some notable performances, including a victory over Poughkeepsie neighbor Spackenkill, which reached the Class B state final last season. Their ties came against Section 1 power Briarcliff and Kingston, the defending Section 9 Class AAA champion.
It's a family affair
“We try to take it game-by-game and you can’t think far ahead,” Evan Cancro said, “but I’ve thought about the possibility of winning a championship with my mom. It’s definitely a goal and something I know would be my favorite moment as an athlete.”
That'd make for quite the "Dear Mama" highlight.
Frank Cancro might be the proudest father in the stands at Lourdes games, cheering vociferously during games. After all, he joked, “I’ve got two horses in this race.”
Given the good vibes, an expressed love of the school community and all those personal connections, Eileen Cancro said the program has a “family atmosphere.”
Well, for her, that’s kind of unavoidable.
Evan’s older siblings, Andrew and Anna, also were coached by their mother as kids and both went on to play for Arlington. Anna, who is now a law school student, runs the team’s social media accounts along with Larissa DeVito.
Eileen Cancro began teaching Evan the basics when he was 4 and coached him at the youth level, so there is a longstanding player-to-coach rapport and a tacit understanding of each other, which has made this autumn version of their relationship simple.
“Even when she wasn’t my actual coach, I’d go to her for insight,” the 18-year-old said. “She’s played and coached at a high level, and I know she knows me better than I know myself. My strength on the field is tactical knowledge, which I get from her. Probably some genetics, too.”
Often, when a parent coaches their child, there is an overhanging perception of bias to some degree. That’s dispelled somewhat by the player Evan has become and the personality traits he has developed, teammates insisted.
“Their relationship is super professional,” Yough said. “She probably holds him to a higher standard than anyone else, and Evan is always trying to the do right things anyway.”
He and the other senior leaders are mindful of what they say and do, and there's a concerted effort to set positive examples for the underclassmen.
“He’s a pleasure to coach,” Eileen Cancro said of Evan. “We’ve been around each other for so long, as a player and coach, that we’re on the same page and I rarely have to be tough on him.
“He is a teenager, and he’ll sometimes challenge me at home as a mom. But it doesn’t happen in soccer.”
He knows better. You don’t talk back to your mo, umm, 'Coach.'
Stephen Haynes: shaynes@poughkeepsiejournal.com;845-437-4826;Twitter: @StephenHaynes4